Loving the Return of my Energy!!

What a great weekend!! Starting on Friday my energy levels took a jump and I have to tell you I feel almost normal again. Of course, the big danger is I will take advantage of this surge of energy, do too much and knock myself on my butt...so believe me when I tell you I am still taking it easy and trying not to over do it!!

On Saturday we drove to Cookstown for a visit with my family. It was great to see my family and for them to see me and know I'm fighting hard! It was especially important to me for my nieces and nephews to see me and know Auntie Sue is the same as always! Starting with this beautiful girl right here!! This is my niece Brooklyn, who is somehow already 18 and heading to Nipissing in the fall. I think she's amazing and I'm so proud of her. And I'm a little jealous of the fun she is going to have...ahhhh...University days...

It was amazing to get a big hug from the little people in my life!! Just look at this bunch of smiling faces giving me some loving! That's Emma, Alyssa, Olivia, Luke and Alex. Cutie Patooties!! They hardly grumbled at all when I made them stop their game for a photo op...I'm sure it was just a wee grumble because they all love me so much!!

Special thanks to my sisters Maureen and Sandy for doing double time in the kitchen to make sure Matt, Alex and I filled our tanks before we had to hit the road!! You girls are awesome and you ROCK!!

There's something to be said about going and getting a hug from my Dad! He has lots of questions about my treatment and is always concerned that I'm getting the best care. Thanks for the loving, Dad!! I hope Matt and I were able to answer all your questions.



Thank you Emma for the preview of your competition pieces! I'm sorry I won't be able to come and cheer you on over Labour Day weekend, but I will be cheering from K-W and hope you and Olivia do great!! I'll be expecting texts, photos and videos to catch me up to date!! Tons of fiddle talent in two tiny packages!!




The youngest smiley faces...a bit of loving from the Walker clan - PJ, Sam & Sydney.






I would be remiss if I didn't mention Dave, Nancy, Billy & Charlie...I missed seeing you guys today! I thank you for understanding how important it is that I stay as healthy as I can so I can keep my treatment plan on track. Not to mention I just don't have the immune system to fight anything that might be out there. It stinks that means I didn't get to see you on Saturday. I hope Charlie is feeling better and I get to see your smiling faces soon!!

One more shout out before I sign off...to my main man, Matt!! Way to go on your 10km run this morning at the Fergus Highland Games! You did awesome and I am beyond impressed at your focus and determination. It was sweet to see you cross the FINISH line, minutes earlier than expected!!

xoxoxo

Did you miss me??

I know, I know...it's been a few days since my last entry and you are wondering how I am and what I've been up to and if I got a wig...so hold on to your hats and let me fill you in!!

I had a super visit with my Mom. She arrived on Monday and left yesterday. We went to the GRRCC for a little "Intro to Chemo" class and a tour. I was able to show my mom the suite where I get my chemo. I know it let my Mom see what great hands I'm in and how many resources are available to me!! She also got to witness first hand that I do, in fact, have the best nurse ever with Matt. He takes awesome care of me and I know it let Mom go home feeling less worried about me. I know, she's a Mom, she's going to worry...at least she knows I'm doing really well because she's seen it for herself!!

My Mom and I did go to Hopespring (another amazing resource for Cancer patients in K-W) where I tried on a bunch of wigs (with the assistance of Irene) and came home with one. It was red and blond and brown and a little longer and puffier. And today, we took it back and got one that fits my face and style better (insert boring here). It was super fun to check out wigs with my Mom and try on all kinds of styles...it's just at the end of the day, I think I want to just be me. And I'm not really very crazy. Thank you so much to Irene who spent time with me not once, but twice this week, helping me find the one I want. And I just have to add that she encouraged me to come back if I change my mind again!! Wonder when that will get old for her??!!

I am feeling pretty good. I am stronger and have more energy in the evenings. I'm tired during the day and my attention span isn't always the best. I keep thinking I'm going to pick up a good book (I actually have two lenders ready for me on the table), but I haven't made it there yet. So far magazines and the newspaper seem to do me just fine! I'm tired because the chemo is killing off my blood cells and so my body has to make new ones. The white blood cells help me kill off infection. That's why I can't be around any sickies while I'm on chemo...my white blood cells are down and I don't have the same immune system to fight any crap with. I have been feeling some discomfort in my throat, kind of like heartburn. Chocolate milk helps. It's not there all the time, but when it is there, it makes me not want to eat or drink. And sometimes it makes things taste gross. I'm trying Tums to see if it helps. The red blood cells carry oxygen from your lungs through your body. So, when these cells are killed off, the oxygen in the blood is down, and you get tired while new cells are produced. Any medical people that would like to comment on the above, please feel free...I hope I have it right!!

I do have to take my temperature twice a day because the risk of infection is so high. So far so good on that front. Although I'm impatient with the thermometer at Matt's so I think I'm splurging for a new one. Seriously...how long should it take to read my temperature?? Anyway, even if I feel 100%, I still take my temperature and confirm nothing is wrong. I have strict instructions (from EVERYONE) that as soon as I have a temperature (38.3 c) that I have to head to the Cancer Centre (or the ER if it's after hours).

I have been hooked up with CCAC. They came last Friday after my chemo to give me a needle to help with the replenishment of the white blood cells. I had a case manager come to the house today to explain the other services that they are able to get for me. It really does seem never ending...and amazing!! The services and resources really do make you feel like you are in the best of hands.

I did learn something while at my Chemo Class with Mom that had me cursing. They keep talking about sugar free candies helping keep the mouth moist (the risk for mouth sores is huge...although I haven't experienced any yet). I had to ask "Why sugar free". This was a stupid thing to do. The answer is "bacteria thrives on sugar". Are you kidding me? I love sugar! There is little chance I can get through this journey without chocolate and ice cream. So ... stupid little mouth sores ... I will conquer you with salt and water or whatever it takes but I will still enjoy some sugar!!

Thanks to everyone for the positive comments on my new short due. It's very very short...just need a teeny tiny bit of shampoo to wash it. At this point it seems a little too short for me, and so probably will grow it a little longer when I can. But it is fun to try something new and it's great to have the thumbs up from Debbie that my head is shaped fairly well. Hey! Maybe I'll ditch the wig all together and just be bald or scarved for the next few months. Wonder how brave I really am...

I know this is a long entry and I appreciate all of you checking in for an update. If you have any questions or thoughts you want me to comment on, please feel free to email me or post a comment here and I'll chat about it in my next posting. There are no bad or stupid questions. If I don't feel like being public with the info, I'll still get back to you!

With love to all of you!

xoxoxo

The Hairs Have Been Cut!!

Here is my pre-cut look...a little wild and crazy but I was hoping to grow my hair longer this summer...before this unexpected turn of events!!








And here is my post-cut look thanks to my friend Debbie who did a great job of taking me to this new pixie look! I'm now ready to try on wigs!!

It has been a good weekend!! I got lots of fresh air, had some nice visits with wonderful people and even got a chance to watch my man ride a few laps at the motocross track today. You'd wonder why it would feel so good to do something so normal!! It was awesome sitting on my lawnchair, with my feet up, my magazine in hand and strawberries in a dish to be eaten...and watching Matt hit the jump he's been working on!! Wahoo!!

Tomorrow my Mom is coming to see me for a few days. We're going to take an Intro to Chemo class together, and maybe do some wig shopping. No...I'm not going red and I'm not getting a mohawk (blue or otherwise)...and I've heard how hot these things are, so pretty sure I'll be keeping it short. My brother mentioned to me tonight that he has a ball cap with some hair attached to it that he'll lend to me...that sounds promising - NOT!!! I have this vision of me looking like Mike Myers...

It's bedtime, so time to knock it off for tonight. Need to make sure I get loads of rest...I'll fill you in more on that tomorrow!!

xoxoxo

Starting to feel a little more normal...

Hello Everybody!!

It has been a rough couple of days...I had my first chemo treatment on Thursday and within a few hours of getting home, I was feeling rough. Very nauseous and just feeling awful. We had a really rough night on Thursday night (thank goodness I have Matt!!) Yesterday I was back to the hospital to get some fluids injected via IV and some more anti-nausea drugs. I'm proud to report I haven't puked in 33 hours!!

I have to tell you how amazing everyone is at the Cancer Centre. Ann (pictured above with me giving me my first chemo treatment) was wonderful, as was Deb and Justine and the other nurses who stopped over to see how I was doing. Going back yesterday for some fluids, I felt like an old pro already!!

Anyway, today I'm feeling considerably better. Matt & I both got some great sleep last night and the nausea seems to be taking a break. I'm tired, and I have a minor headache. But other than that, I feel ok.

I know some of you have been wondering about the drugs, so I'll give you the short version of what I am taking:

I'm on the AC&T (high dose) chemo drugs. So the AC is Adriamycin (or Doxorubicin) and Cyclophosphamide. I get these two drugs for four treatments. The Adriamycin is red (bright red) and is injected via a big fat needle into the IV (that's what Ann is doing above). The Cychlophosphamide is just a clear drug that is administered through the regular IV. They also give me an anti-nausea drug via IV before any chemo drugs. When I'm done the four treatments of AC I switch over to the T part - Taxol (or Paclitaxel). I also have a needle the day after my chemo treatments (the nurse comes to the house for this) for Neulasta. The neulasta is to help stimulate the growth of white blood cells. I have three prescriptions for anti-nausea drugs. Two of these drugs (Ondansetron and Dexamethasone) I take the first few days after treatment. The third I can take at any time - every four hours - if I need it (Prochlorperazine). See...I wasn't kidding when I said I was learning a lot!!

I think I'm going to get my haircut and start thinking about some wig shopping...and for all you crazy people with crazy ideas, I think I'm going to try and stay as close to my normal look as possible...but I guess you never know!! Pictures to follow!!


Thank you to everyone who have been calling, sending emails, texts, and flowers. I am truly grateful for all the loving and am taking it all in!! Matt & I are heading out to get some fresh air today...it's going to feel great to get out of the house and not be heading in the direction of the hospital!!

xoxoxox

One Down...

Everything went well this morning at GRRCC. Everyone was wonderful and helpful and sweet.

I'm feeling quite rough since late this afternoon and still feel quite rough now. Nurse Matt is doing a fantastic job of taking care of me.

I promise I will give you a full update as soon as I can sit up for more than a few minutes at a time. I'm trying to keep as quiet as I can...so my cell is off and Matt is taking any calls that come in for me on his phone.

Thank you for all the emails. I will get back to those as soon as I can too!!

Love to all of you.

xoxox

Less than 12 hours from now...

Yep...it's true. In less than 12 hours I'll be hooked up for my first chemo treatment. How's that for speedy service??!! I am overwhelmed with the amazing and speedy service that I am receiving from the GRRCC (that's Grand River Regional Cancer Centre...what can I say, I'm a sucker for acronyms!!)

So, I got a call at 4:00 pm today to confirm that I have my first treatment at 10:00 am tomorrow. Wow. Talk about cleaning up your desk fast! I feel bad for the poor folks who got some last minute (can you say speed of lightning) training ... or in the case of Sue, a note on her desk! Thank you so much to all my friends at Arca, who are willing to jump in and help me out in so many ways!! Keep those work fires burning my fellow co-workers, I'll be back before you know it!! Special thanks to those who sign my cheque for your understanding, support and use of a laptop while I'm off. I love this sitting on the couch while blogging thing...a girl could get used to this!!

Back to tomorrow's appointment...here's the scoop...my appointment for the chemo is at 10:00 am. But before I have chemo, I meet with the pharmacist to learn about the drugs I've been prescribed (both the actual IV drugs for chemo, along with the pills I'll have to swallow). There are tons of them...and I can tell you more about them when I know more about them myself!!

The chemo should take about an hour and a half to administer. Matt is taking me to tomorrow's appointment. It's good to have two ears listening to what they tell me and since I can't drive the day of chemo, it's good to have a driver. Hope he doesn't mind too much if I puke in his new white truck!! ha ha ha Come on, I have to find some fun somewhere!! Anyway, back to the chemo. I can expect to lose my hair (every last morsel...even my eyelashes) within 2-3 weeks of my first chemo appointment. So I have called my friend Debbie to see if she can cut my hair short for me. I figure it'll be better to have short hairs fall out than long ones. My sidekick Matt thinks it would be funny to grab two large tuffs of hair from the side of my head and say "You're driving me crazy, I'm pulling my hair out!" He thinks he's funny!! Correction, he thinks he's hilarious. Anyway, they tell me I should shop for a wig before chemo because the chemo can make your scalp sensitive. Well..they didn't leave me much time for wig shopping, did they?? Hoping I'll feel well enough this weekend to give it some thought.

Speaking about side effects, the list is long...suffice it to say you'll have some interesting reading in the future. Maybe I should consider a "Poop Warning"!!

The last thing to tell you about tonight is that I will be having one more test. An MRI on both breasts. We can't get a breast MRI in K-W, so I think I'm heading to Mississauga for this one!! And yes, I'll let you know when it's been scheduled.

Well my friends, I'm off to bed. A girl needs her beauty sleep before her first chemo treatment. The camera is packed...I smell a kodak moment on the horizon!!

xoxo

And Aaaawwwwaaaayyyy We Go!!!

Yes...the big day has come and I have had my first appointment with my Medical Oncologist. She is really super nice and her nurse, Pat, is also wonderful. I have to admit I was a little nervous heading into the appointment today, but I feel really good about it now! Both Dr. Nadia Califaretti and Pat were awesome with the information and making sure both Matt & I understood the situation.

First the really good news!!! All of the scans and tests have come back clear!! That means there is no visible sign that the cancer has spread. I'm very very happy about this. I know that this does not mean that the cancer cells have not packed their bags and moved on...but it does mean that the chemo will (hopefully) blast any of those wandering bastards!! And it also means that the MUGA scan I had last week showed I have a healthy, strong pumping heart that is ready to take on the chemo drugs!

The other big news today is that my chemo treatments are going to start in the very near future. Either the end of this week or the beginning of next week. I was surprised to hear it could be this week, and am grateful we can get going so quickly!! I will hear from the Cancer Centre tomorrow with my appointment and than it's full speed ahead. I have been armed with prescriptions, information, advice and suggestions...and it's all spinning around in my head!! It is amazing to have so much information because in my humble opinion, information is power! And both Matt & I are all about understanding what is happening and what is going to happen. Yes, I know that's a big surprise to some of you!!

Here's how the chemo treatments will work. Me and my hired help go to the Cancer Centre for my treatments. They hook me up to an IV and I sit there for about an hour and a half. When I'm done, I get to go home. I am not allowed to drive myself. I will have one treatment every two weeks and I will receive 8 treatments. For those of you who struggled through Grade 3 math, that means 16 weeks of chemo...and chemo side effects.

It also means that I will have to stop working pretty soon. The doctor confirmed today that I will likely not be up for working once chemo starts, and even if I am, may prefer to work from home (especially since my immune system will be compromised by the chemo and I don't want to be any where near any sickies - or any potential sickies for that matter). Note to each and every one of you that I love and am very happy to have with me on this journey - Please do not come to see if you are sick, have a cold, or feel under the weather in any way. I wish you a speedy recovery and when you feel 100%, you are welcome to come see me!!

Well...I know some of you have been waiting for this update, so I'll hit post now. Feel free to email me or comment with any questions that you have and I will make sure I address them (if I can) tomorrow. I will have more information (hopefully) for you tomorrow when I know when my first treatment is scheduled for.

Here we go...

xoxoxo